Billy woke to the sounds of furtive shuffling and giggles. 'Oh gods, they are at it again,' he thought. More often than not, the hobbits and Orli, who had become a single unit somehow, all crashed at a single location when they didn't have early call. It just made things easier than cabs and designated drivers. Last night, they had gathered at Elijah's for what the youngest hobbit termed a 'Classic Americana Movie Night'. The line up included Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Porky's, Weird Science, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. Billy shook his head. It was really amazing that Elijah managed to be as sane as he appeared, being raised in Hollywood.

Hushed voices sounded from the other room. "There's no room." "Move over." "It's not going to fit." "You can't tie it there. We'll have to figure out some other way." "This is a stupid idea." "Well, do you want to fuck the Ranger, or not?"

What the fuck? Billy sat straight up in the bed, fully awake, with images of Viggo naked and hog-tied on the floor. Scrambling out of bed, he ran into the living room. Sliding to a halt, he stood dumbfounded, staring at his co-stars.

Elijah, Dominic, and Orli sat in a circle on the floor dressed in nothing but boxers. In the center of the circle was a stack of books, the Lord of the Rings trilogy from what Billy could make out. On top of the 'altar' was the Strider doll that had been shipped to Peter last week along with the other action figures planned for the first movie's release. They had promptly stolen them all from Peter's trailer. Those dolls had since been in situations that would make a rentboy blush, but this took the cake.

Strider was connected to Elijah's computer by a nest of wires and the screen was filled with a series of words. Billy spotted desire and sex immediately. "You forgot the big tits," he commented drolly.

"Viggo doesn't have tits…" Orlando started, halting mid-retort as he realized they were being watched.

"Oooo… but we could stuff other parts," Dom suggested, excited.

"Sod off." Orli punched Dom in the shoulder, pushing him over. "Viggo's fine just the way he is."

"I can't believe you wankers are actually doing this," Billy exclaimed. "How much did you drink after I went to bed?"

Elijah looked up, eyes wide and dilated. "Well…"

Billy rubbed a weary hand over his face. "Fuck, you guys 'ave been smokin' too."

"Only a bit," Dom defended.

"Well, get this bit of modern technological voodoo over with so I can get some sleep. Bloody wankers," Billy mumbled as he shuffled back into the bedroom.

~~~~~

Their scheduled early morning surf didn't happen the next day. Surprise. Surprise. Billy went out for donuts, returning just as Orlando was dragging himself out of bed. Dom and Elijah were still dead to the world.

"So what did you hope to accomplish with your drug-induced mad scientist experiment last night?" he asked Orlando, handing him a cup of coffee and closing the blinds without being asked.

"Well… Elijah said maybe it would work to… oh hell… he flirts with me, you know, but then it never goes…" Orlando stammered to a halt.

"So what unholy suggestion did you blokes give our poor future king?"

Orlando blushed, looking down at his hands.

Billy could see his lips moving and wasn't letting him off that easy. Oh no, this was too good to drop. "What was that?"

"I want him to slam me up against a bloody wall and fuck me 'til I scream!" the Elf snapped. "Happy?" Throwing down a half-eaten donut, he stormed from the room.

"Very," Billy answered with a grin.

~~~~~

"Orlando, your bow needs to be on the left," Peter yelled for the fifth time. Usually the Elf was good of keeping track of the details of multiple takes, but today he couldn't focus worth a shit. Every time he turned around, Viggo was looking at him with those damn all-knowing eyes.

"Sorry," he called, switching the weapon and pulling on his Elf mask.

The scene was captured from three more angles before Peter finally declared they were done. "Enjoy dinner, folks. I'll see you back here in the morning."

"Dinner, yeah, right," Orlando mumbled, heading for the trailer.

"Orli, wait up," Viggo called, jogging to catch up. "You okay?" he asked, falling into step beside him.

"Oh, yeah. No worries, mate. Just too much partying with the hobbits." Orlando shrugged.

"You sure that's all it is?" Viggo asked, holding open the door to the trailer and motioning for Orlando to go in first.

"Yeah, that's it. Why? Should something else be bothering me?" Orlando turned around with a worried expression. Had Viggo heard something? If one of those damn loose-lipped hobbits had… ohhh… he'd kill 'em.

"I just haven't been sleeping real well." Viggo pulled off his wig and ran his fingers through his shoulder length hair. "I keep having these really vivid dreams… and… well… I think I know what's causing them and I thought… well I thought you might be feeling it too."

"Feeling what exactly?" Orlando asked, his body beginning to tingle from standing so close to the American actor.

"Well… fuck it! This!" Viggo's muscular body slammed into Orlando, carrying them both to the wall. His fingers pushed under Legolas's wig, dislodging it and finding the smooth skin and soft curls underneath. Slightly chapped lips sealed against his mouth, cheek, chin, jaw, neck and up onto an elven ear.

Orlando moaned, arching his neck in a silent plea for more. Viggo growled, running his teeth along the stretched tendons and sucking a purplish bruise over the fluttering pulse. "Fuck!" Orlando swore, wrapping a leg around the Ranger's hip and grinding against him wantonly.

"Need you." Viggo pressed forward, pinning Orlando's hips to the wall and fucking him through the multiple layers of their costumes.

"Ohfuckohfuckohfuck," Orlando panted, clutching the soft, dark hair and pulling Viggo's head up from his chest. "Gonna come if you don't stop. Want you to fuck me," he managed.

Viggo grinned ferally, humming his approval. Running his tongue along the angle of Orlando's jaw, he kissed the Elf, sucking the breath out of his lungs and plundering every corner of his mouth until there was no doubt who had claimed him. "I'm going to fuck you 'til you scream," he groaned, his fingers busy with the fastening on the elf costume.

Orlando paused, the eerily familiar words seeping through his lust induced stupor. "Viggo, why..."

"Why what, Elfboy?" Orlando was mostly naked now and Viggo was working on his own costume.

"Why now? This? After so long?" He could see the Hobbits setting this up as a cruel joke, but he couldn't see Viggo going along with it. Not this far.

Viggo paused, his shirt hanging from his shoulders, completely unbuttoned, and his pants open but still hugging his hips. Orlando's eyes fixed on the dark trail of hair running down from the Ranger's chest and disappearing into the open trousers. He licked his lips unconsciously and Viggo leered, leaning forward, pressing bare chest to bare chest, his lips hovering less than an inch from Orlando's. Suddenly, Orlando didn't care if it was a joke. He'd take Viggo anyway he could get him.

"I can't explain it," Viggo whispered, the breath of his words brushing Orlando's face. "The attraction - it's always been there, but today I just can't seem to resist. Want you…" The lips brushed gently over Orli's parted lips. "…so much."

"Yours," Orlando sighed, his hands running up the furry chest and over Viggo's shoulders, pushing the shirt to the ground. They continued down the muscled back, sliding inside the unfastened pants, pushing them lower until he could grab Viggo's ass and pull him closer. "Take me." He bit at Viggo's lower lip, pulling it back with an impish grin glowing in his dark eyes.

"Again and again," Viggo promised, delighting in the tremor that ran up the Elf's spine. Pushing the Elf's leggings lower, he growled, "Take off your boots."

Orlando shook his head, turning around and offering his ass to the Ranger. "Can't wait. Fuck me."

Viggo swung Orlando over the arm of a make-up chair, knocking bottles and brushes from the counter as he searched for the lube they used on his hair. Pushing his own pants to his knees, he spread the creamy white ass cheeks. 'Fast, oh yeah… but I've got to taste that…' he thought, swiping his tongue over the tight pink hole. The ball-tightening moan he got from Orlando convinced him to do it again. And again. He licked until the hole was wet and quivering, Orlando almost sobbing into his folded arms.

"Bloody fuckin' hell, just fuck me!" the trembling Elf screamed, turning around to glare at his tormentor.

The corner of Viggo's mouth twitched up in evil delight, his chin and cheeks shiny and wet from his efforts. "Okay."

Orlando relaxed back against the chair and Viggo stabbed his tongue deep into the small opening. Orlando's back arched and he howled. The feeling was almost too intense and he squirmed, trying to escape.

Viggo's hands clamped down like steel vices on his hips, leaving evenly spaced bruises as he fucked and stretched the tight entrance. Kicking Orlando's feet further apart, he removed all of the Elf's leverage. "I'm going to fuck you now," he rasped, quickly rolling on a condom and thrusting two fingers into the clenching opening. With a brutal twist, he curled his fingers to find the young man's prostate.

"Viggo!"

"Now, Elfboy, now I make you mine." With one long push, the Ranger sheathed himself in the welcoming body. "Hold on," he warned, skipping the adjustment phase and pounding in hard and fast.

Orlando's hands gripped the far arm of the chair, knuckles white. With each thrust, he pushed back. "Ohfuckmoreharder…ohrightfuckingthere," he keened, his shoulders rolling back.

Viggo grabbed his head, twisting him around to join their mouths in a messy, sloppy kiss. Running a hand down the smooth chest, his fingers pinched and twisted at the enormous coffee nipples. "I want you to come for me," he drawled almost lazily like he wasn't fucking Orlando through the chair and into the floor. His hand splayed flat across the space from belly button to cock, fingers tunneling into the wiry curls, circling the hard shaft.

With a single stroke, Orlando was coming, screaming Viggo's name over and over like a litany. Viggo continued to thrust, the blunt head scraping repeatedly over the hypersensitive gland, causing cascades of aftershocks that left Orlando weak and shaking. With a deep groan, Viggo buried himself as deep as he could in his lover, collapsing against the sweat-slick back as he gave in to his own climax.

Scattering kisses across the Elf's back and shoulders, Viggo pushed back from the vinyl chair. He helped Orlando stand, wrapping an arm around his waist as he swayed unsteadily. Swiping a towel off the counter and onto the chair, he sat with a thump before his own knees gave out, pulling his Elf into his arms.

Orlando curled up on Viggo's lap, his legs over the arm and his head nestled securely on his shoulder. "Could fall asleep like this…" he mumbled, sated and sleepy.

"We could," Viggo breathed into the dark curls, "but we'd be more comfortable at my place."

Orlando lifted his eyes. "Really?"

"I promised you a slow and easy next time," Viggo reminded his lover, "and that would be easier in a bed. There are still lots of you I haven't tasted."

Orlando shivered. "Let's go. I think I need a shower before I get dressed."

Viggo looked down that the come streaked chest. "Probably a good idea. You get the water warm and I'll hang up the costumes."

Orlando smiled and bounced up. Suddenly, with the prospect of a night of sex with Viggo, he wasn't feeling that tired anymore. With a quick kiss, he disappeared into the small bathroom.

Viggo grinned and reached for the phone as soon as he heard the water. The person he dialed answered after one ring. "Well it wasn't against the wall, but he screamed," Viggo said.

"Guess you'll have to do it again, then," Billy laughed. "Damn independent Rangers can't take direction worth a shit."

"Fuck you," Viggo laughed.

"Oh, go fuck yer Elf," Billy replied, hanging up with a smug smile on his face.