Chapter Two



Hunter was plagued with worry for the entire flight to Texas. He sat unmoving, his hands fixed on the armrests in a death grip. Sensing that he needed to be left alone with his thoughts, Steph turned her mind to the situation at hand. Most new brides would have been upset at the idea of their honeymoon being cut short, but that was insignificant to her. She knew Hunter loved her, maybe not as much as she loved him, but the feelings were there. The people that truly came first in his heart were his friends - Sean, Kevin, Scott, and especially Shawn. While anyone who knew them knew that there wasn't anything one Clique member wouldn't do for one of the others, the bond between Hunter and Shawn went even deeper than that. They were brothers in every way except blood, and she was sure that Hunter would go quietly and completely mad if anything happened to Shawn. They had been best friends practically since the moment they met, and had stayed close even through Shawn's four-year retirement, and no one had been more thrilled than Hunter when Shawn had returned to wrestling in June of last year. Her mind drifted, and time passed mercifully quickly. Soon, she could feel the plane making its landing approach, and she also felt Hunter stiffen beside her. She laid a soothing hand on his arm.

"It's not going to help him if you race out of here like a madman." She reminded him quietly, feeling the tension in his muscles. "I know you want to be there. We'll get a car when we land, and I'll take you to the hospital and go get a hotel room for us."

He turned to her, and though the words couldn't seem to come, the gratitude in his eyes was enough answer for her.

"You can call me if you need to, but I think you guys need some time to deal with this. I'll call Dad and fill him in on this, if he doesn't already know. Did Sean get in touch with Kevin and Scott?"

Hunter nodded. "He said they were already on their way there when he called me."

"Good. You'll need each other, and he'll need the four of you to get through this."

"You think he'll make it?" he asked, his hand gripping hers.

"I think Shawn has too much fight in him to just let go." she replied, praying silently that she was right.



Less than an hour later, Hunter stood in front of the entrance to the hospital, knowing he had to go in, but reluctant to actually do it. Before he could work up the guts to make a decision either way, a voice interrupted his reverie.

"Hunt, man, thank God you're here."

He turned to see Sean hurrying toward him. Worry filled him again as he saw that Sean's face was pale except for the shadows beneath his dark eyes, shadows that hadn't been there at the wedding two days before. The two embraced, and Sean took his arm and led him inside, heading straight for the elevators.

"What happened, Kid?" Hunter demanded as soon as the elevator doors closed and they were alone. Sean sighed heavily and raked a hand through his thick dark curls.

"Shawn was driving, we think headed home from somewhere, we aren't quite sure where. He lost control on a curve, and wrapped the car around a tree."

Hunter's brow furrowed in confusion. "But Shawn knows the roads around here like the back of his hand, and he's a good driver. How could he just lose control?"

Sean shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans, his face grim. "He was smashed, Hunter. His blood alcohol level was about three times the legal limit when they brought him in."

"But I thought Shawn quit drinking years ago, when he hurt his back." Hunter replied dumbly.

"So did the rest of us, Hunt. We can't figure why he would have been drunk, and trust me, we've discussed it. He used to swear to me, to all of us, that he'd never touch alcohol again."

"Me too. I wonder what pushed him to it." He mused idly. "Is the bitch starting shit with him again?"

Sean's dark eyes narrowed to slits at the mention of Shawn's ex-wife. "Not that I knew of. Last Shawn knew, she was in Vegas with her latest boy toy."

"Slut." Hunter commented succinctly. "What about Cam?"

"With Shawn's mom and dad. They had him for the weekend anyway, since Shawn was in New York for the wedding. They know what's going on, and I promised to call them if anything happens."

The elevator doors slid silently open, and Sean led Hunter down the hall. "Come on, Kev and Scott got here a while back. We're taking it in turns to see him, because we only get five minutes at the top of every hour. My turn's next, you can take it."

They reached a tiny waiting room, and Hunter saw Kevin and Scott huddled in a corner, hands clasped and silent. Kevin saw them first and rose, capturing Hunter in a hug that would have crushed a smaller man. Hunter held on for a moment, drawing on the strength he knew Kevin possessed in abundance. That was the way it'd always been. Kevin was the strong one, the big brother of the Clique. Scotty was the wiseass, the one who could always make everyone laugh. Sean was the youngest, and usually the peacemaker in every fight. He'd been the tough guy, the quiet guy; the levelheaded, responsible, smart guy. And Shawn was the listener; the one everyone went to with their problems, the one who always had advice for any situation. What would he be doing if it were one of them who'd done this, one of them hovering between life and death? Hunter decided he'd have been the one who got in touch with everyone, who held them all together.

"Thank God you're here. We were so worried that you wouldn't get here in time." Kevin said, interrupting his thoughts.

"It's that bad?" Hunter asked, his face pale.

"Unfortunately." Scott added, hugging Hunter as well. He glanced at the wall clock to see that it was five minutes to nine.

"I want to talk to the doctors."

Sean laid a comforting and restraining hand on his shoulder. "You will, but not until after you see him. They can explain what's wrong better than we can. Don't freak when you go in there. He's hooked up to all kinds of machines, and that pretty-boy face of his is messed up. From what they're telling us, that iron skull got the worst of it, though the rest of him isn't in good shape, either. He's got a few broken ribs, a sprained wrist, and some pretty bad gashes from the glass."

Hunter's mouth was dry as he nodded. The four of them took seats, no longer talking, all their thoughts focused on Shawn. Hunter buried his face in his hands and roll-called his and Shawn's friendship. The early days, when Shawn had been skipping up the ladder of success, and had reached out his hand to take Hunter with him. The brief time they'd spent at the top, working hard and partying harder. The last months of Shawn's career, knowing the pain he'd been in and unable to help. That last night in Boston, when they'd thrown their arms around each other and cried like babies. The long months on the road without him, calling whenever he could and flying down to Texas as often as possible. Shawn's uncharacteristic withdrawal for a few months, then the shocking announcement that he'd gotten married. Shawn's frantic call when Becky'd gone into labor, then the euphoric joy on his face when Cameron was placed into his arms for the first time. Watching Shawn adjust to fatherhood with the single-mindedness he'd applied to everything else in his life. Holding his hand when the divorce had gone through. And of course, the last year together, when Shawn had abruptly returned to wrestling, and they'd been together again. Hunter felt a tap on his arm and looked up to see Sean.

"Go on, in the room right across the hall. Talk to him, whatever, just don't touch any of the bandages or his ribs. Maybe...maybe if he knows you're here, he'll wake up."

Sean's voice broke, and Hunter squeezed his hand before crossing the hall and stepping into the room Sean had indicated. He couldn't hold back a low moan at the sight of Shawn. Put plainly, he looked horrible. Hunter managed to sit in the chair beside the bed, and took the hand that wasn't bandaged in his.

"Shawn, it's Hunt. Please, man, you have to wake up. I don't know what the hell happened, but I know for damn sure we'll fall apart without you. I'll fall apart without you. Please don't die on me, Shawn. I need you. We've still got so much trouble to cause, Shawn."

He was barely aware of the tears streaming down his cheeks as he pressed his forehead to Shawn's limp hand, his sobs uncontrollable. His body shook as he cried, the fears in his mind tumbling out as he rambled on. Suddenly, he stopped crying, his head jerking up as Shawn's hand moved slightly. He grasped it tighter, watching Shawn intently. A moment later, Shawn's eyes opened, and Hunter bit his lip to hold back the shout of joy.

"Hunt...you got here." Shawn whispered, his voice weak.

"Of course I got here, you putz. You interrupted my damned honeymoon." Hunter's smile was fond. He couldn't hold back the joy that was coursing through him. Shawn was going to be okay.

"Where are...the guys?"

"Just outside. I'll get them in here."

"No, stay." Shawn's face was contorted with pain, and Hunter sat back down, his brow creased with concern.

"Shawn, whatever it is, it can wait until you get better. Don't try to talk."

"Hunt...no. Has to be now. You...always there for me. There's a book...lots of them...for you, for...after. So much I never said...it's all there. You need to know...don't hate me. Promise...never hate me."

"Shawn, I could never hate you, I swear it."

"One...one more thing. Promise...let them take care of you. You'll...need them when I'm gone."

"You're not going anywhere, Shawn." Hunter whispered, his voice desperate as his joy congealed back into cold terror. This can't be happening, he thought wildly, I can't live without him.

Shawn smiled weakly. "Wish...I believed you. Was...was stupid. Shoulda...gone home earlier. Got tired...head was buzzing...couldn't see the road. All my fault..."

"Don't blame yourself, Shawn. We've all done stupid shit in our lives."

"This...beyond stupid. Should have told you before...too scared...didn't want to lose you. Promise...Hunt...take care of Cam. He'll...miss me."

"Shawn, don't talk like that." Hunter begged, frantic now. "Nothing's going to happen to you. You're going to live to be an old man, scratching and farting and telling lies about the bad old days."

Shawn's hand tightened on his. "Never...don't forget me, Hunt...always like my brother."

Hunter heard the struggle in his voice and stroked his hand soothingly, though he wanted to scream and cry. "You're getting yourself too worked up, Shawn. Just rest."

"Don't wanna...rest. Need to tell you...I love you. Always...did. Even though...never said it. You were...more than my friend, Hunt. I've always...always loved you."

"I know we were more than friends, Shawn. You're like a brother to me. I love you, too."

Shawn smiled again, the pain suddenly disappearing from his handsome face. "It...doesn't hurt anymore, Hunt...I'll miss you."

His eyes closed, and Hunter squeezed his hand.

"Shawn...don't do this. You can't go..."

But it was too late. The monitors buzzed, and Hunter could feel Shawn's hand, limp in his. A nurse rushed in and shooed him out, closing the door. He backed out into the hall, his eyes wide and scared. "Hunter...what's wrong?" Kevin's voice seemed to echo in his ears.

"He's gone...he's gone." Hunter whispered, his eyes glassy with tears.

Sean, Kevin, and Scott exchanged a glance that spoke more than mere words could. Sean took Hunter's arm and led him to a chair, sitting beside him and wrapping an arm around his broad shoulders, wordlessly offering comfort and support. Hunter stared straight ahead, dazed.

"He...woke up when I went in there. Told me he needed to tell me something. He made me promise to take care of Cam, and he told me he'd miss me."

Sean held back his own tears when Hunter's body began to shake with sobs. There was so much Hunter hadn't known, so much he might never understand now that the one person who could tell him was gone, but for now, he gave Hunter whatever comfort he could.

Kevin watched as Hunter sobbed, his hands tight on Scott's as his own eyes burned. Shawn had been like a younger brother to him, and one of his best friends for nearly ten years. He'd been the one to push him and Scott together, had been the one that both of them had gone to with their troubles and their fears. He'd been so much a part of their lives, and the empty space he left behind was too big to comprehend.

Scott laid his head on Kevin's shoulder, turning his face away from Hunter's raw, wild grief. His throat was choked, but he murmured a quiet prayer in the Spanish he'd painstakingly taught Shawn in their days on the road, until the younger man had spoken it like a native. They'd used it to annoy the other three with regularity, and for things that couldn't be said in front of others. "Vaya con Dios, mi amigo. Vaya con Dios." Go with God, my friend. Go with God.

Sean held onto Hunter even as his tears slowed and finally stopped. He supposed he'd have to step into Shawn's shoes in a way, especially with Hunter. For some reason, the three of them had shared more of a bond with each other than they had with the two older men, who'd dubbed them the 'three musketeers'. Well, they were down to two now, but he'd be damned if he let the companionship that had meant so much to Shawn deteriorate. But there was also the matter of Shawn's secret, he reflected as his eyes locked with first Kevin's and then Scott's over Hunt's head. Shawn may have died because he'd kept it, because they'd all kept it. Where did they go from here?

Read the Next Chapter of My Sacrifice by Melissa