As he stared out the window he felt the familiar sense of longing that had been plaguing him since his arrival. His clothes itched, the cheap fabric rubbing coarsely against his skin. The air was so close the stench of it clogged his throat and made him gag.

He heard the door behind him open and didn't need to turn to know who it was. It was the same every day. No matter what, he always came. Nervousness trembled through him and yet again he wondered what he had done to attract this man's attention. Why was he so special?

The door clicked shut and soft foot steps crossed the small room towards him. His skin prickled when strong arms slid around his waist, holding him firmly against the other man. He closed his eyes when hot breath dampened his neck and nimble fingers slipped under the harsh material of his t-shirt.

"Hi." The voice was a soft rumble, whispered so it wouldn't echo around the confined space. He didn't want people to hear. "I've missed you."

"You always do."

"Whatcha lookin' at?" he asked, looking over his companions shoulder to the world outside.

"Everything."

"Will you look at me?" The question was accompanied by a tender finger to his jaw, turning his head so he could meet the deep green that gazed at him like he was something unexpected.

"I miss it."

"I know. I'm sorry, Jared. I wish I could change it for you," he said, brushing his fingers through Jared's too long hair. "They'd cut this for you, if you let them."

Jared huffed a little laugh but quickly swallowed it back. He didn't have the luxury of humour, even if it did make those green eyes sparkle a little at the victory.

"No, they wouldn't," Jared said quietly, trying to keep his lips from pulling up, but knowing he failed. "They're too scared to come near me with scissors."

"I could cut it, if you want me to," he offered, pushing the hair back again, but leaving his hand there to massage Jared's scalp.

"How come you're not scared of me, Jensen? I could kill you and still you come, every day," Jared asked not for the first time, and just like every other time Jensen studied him and grinned.

"Worth the risk," he replied and something in Jared snapped.

He grasped Jensen by the throat and spun him round so his back was slammed into the barred windows. Jensen gasped as the oxygen was expelled from his lungs by the force of the impact and he fought to fill them again through the suffocating grip of Jared's fingers.

"Is it?" Jared hissed, holding his face close to Jensen's, feeling the small breaths he did manage against his lips. "Is this really worth risking your life for?"

Jensen stared at him. While his eyes bulged a little and his face turned red, he never once lost eye contact with Jared. "Every time," he managed to force out while the life was choked from him, and yet his eyes held no fear.

Jared growled low in his throat as he pressed his body against Jensen's, trapping him where he stood. Not that he made any attempt to get away; he never did, never had.

"You're a fool, Jensen," Jared told him, a hungry smirk forming on his lips right before he smashed them against Jensen's. He didn't release his hold on Jensen's throat, not yet. He knew Jensen couldn't move now, not even if he wanted to. The lack of oxygen made him weak and pliant, but Jensen did fight to kiss him back, his hands grasping in Jared's thin t-shirt as though he was terrified to let go.

Jared bit at Jensen's lips, relishing the small whimpers that fell from his mouth, the skin still tender from the day before where Jared had all but chewed on them. He looked into Jensen's bright jade eyes, seeing the tears in them, just like always. He would never understand why Jensen came here to hurt, came here to be used, but what did Jared care as long as he got what he wanted out of it?

What did Jared want, really? He didn't have a clue, but as he moved his hand to find Jensen's straining erection he didn't much care either. What ever it was, Jensen had it and it was there for the taking. Jared would be insane to not accept.

"Jay," Jensen breathed weakly, his eyes rolling back in his head and something in Jared jolted. He released his hold on Jensen's throat, watching the man gasp down a large gulp of life giving air.

"Why do you come here?" Jared asked the familiar question, knowing the answer he would get. It was always the same.

"For you," Jensen answered; his eyes sure even as his throat convulsed roughly, lungs trying to recover normal activities.

Jared didn't reply, he simply grasped Jensen's shoulder and forced him to move until he fell face first on the hard, sterile bed. Jared didn't waste any time, knowing they didn't have any to spare, and pulled roughly at Jensen's jeans with one hand while the other yanked off his jacket and pushed his shirt up to reveal smooth, naked skin.

"One day, you know I'm going to kill you, don't you?" Jared hissed in Jensen's ear as he exposed his ass and roughly shoved a finger inside his body, grinning at the broken off cry the careless actions provoked. "Do you think you have power over me 'cause you let me fuck you? You think this means something?"

Jensen didn't answer, his hands scrambling for purchase in the worn sheets as another finger was plunged alongside the other. Jared ran a hand up Jensen's back and over his scrunched up clothes to claim a violent grip in his hair, yanking his head back so he could sink his teeth into the tender skin of his neck.

"I could end you right now," Jared promised, breathing in the clean scent of Jensen's skin. The smell was intoxicating to him and he took another long breath of it. "I wonder if you'd even care."

"I don't believe you would," Jensen gasped out, tipping his head back to further expose himself to Jared's manipulations.

Jared's fingers twitched. He wanted nothing more than to twist Jensen's head and snap his spine but something in him prevented it. He would never admit it aloud, but Jensen was right. He wouldn't kill him, didn't think he was capable of it. There was something about Jensen that grounded him, took him away from his prison just long enough to remind him that he was alive, that he still existed on this Earth, even though he was confined to this one room only to be let out in restraints because he was deemed too dangerous to be allowed free around the others.

Angry at the unwelcome realisation that Jensen did hold some sway over him, Jared wrenched his fingers from Jensen's ass and used both hands to rip the rest of Jensen's clothes from his body, leaving him exposed and vulnerable, his t-shirt in tatters on the bed beside his head.

Jensen grunted as he was stripped, a sound that sounded so close to fear that Jared had to see if it was real. He took hold of Jensen's body and forced him to flip onto his back before he pushed his own pants down his legs to reveal his hard length, ready and aching for release.

He grasped Jensen's legs and shoved them up against his chest, moving himself into position above him. He knew Jensen wasn't ready for him, that he was nowhere near open enough to accept his thick cock into his body - but when he looked into Jensen's eyes he didn't see the fear that part of him prayed was there. He just saw a longing that went way beyond the lust for sex. Jensen wanted something more than just a good fucking everyday and the idea infuriated Jared.

In that moment of rage Jared lashed out, backhanding Jensen across the face, splitting his lip open just before he entered him in one, hard thrust. Jensen's head snapped to the side, a surprised gasp escaping him and Jared glowered at the achievement.

When a scream ripped itself from Jensen's lungs at the intrusion to his body, Jared clasped a hand over his mouth. He didn't want their time together to be disturbed as he pushed himself back inside the clenching heat surrounding him.

"You should be more wary of me," he told his victim. Willing or no, Jensen was just a piece of meat, there to pleasure Jared as he saw fit. "You're too soft, Jensen, you should learn to stand up for yourself."

"So you've told me," Jensen said through pained moans and Jared faltered. He didn't remember ever telling Jensen that before and yet the words were so familiar to him. He shook his head, clearing the doubt from his mind and thrusting harder into Jensen's open body.

He was sure he could feel Jensen rip around him and for a moment he almost stopped. He almost withdrew. Something in him clouded his mind, telling him to stop; that he didn't want to hurt the man beneath him.

With a harsh shove and a throaty growl, he forced the thoughts away. This man was nothing to him. He'd just turned up one day, walking through the door with his soft smiles and gentle touches. His body was always pliant and he never once said no, never cried for release or tenderness, as though he knew Jared didn't care to give it to him.

But when Jared looked down and saw the blood streaked across Jensen's face, drawing a violent ruby line from his mouth to his cheek, he felt a prickling behind his eyes.

"I hate you," Jared growled as he pumped himself harder and faster into Jensen's body, forcing the man further back on the bed so that his head was almost hanging off the other end. But Jensen kept his eyes on Jared's, a piercing stare that was so full of tenderness that Jared's head swam with confusion.

"Stop fucking looking at me like that," Jared screamed, not caring now that anyone might hear and come in to stop them. "I'll fucking kill you, you fucking bastard."

Jared grabbed Jensen by the throat again and squeezed with all his might, watching Jensen's eyes grow large in their confines. Jared smirked, finally having control over the situation again.

"You're just a slut, aren't you?" he hissed, bending his neck to bite viciously at Jensen's chest, almost ripping his nipple from his body. He looked up to see Jensen gritting his teeth against the pain, but that only made him bite harder. He was going to hurt this man, he was going to make sure he never came back, because if he did…

"Jay," Jensen panted in a pained sound as he gasped for air, his hand moving to touch Jared's cheek. Jared flinched his head away from the gentle touch. He didn't want it, didn't deserve it. He let go of Jensen's throat to punch him hard in the jaw, once, twice, before he slammed himself back into Jensen's body again and again, faster and more viciously. He held onto Jensen's legs, forcing them impossibly wider as he took what he needed until he felt the welcome heat pooling in his gut, telling him his release was close.

He pushed his body firmly against Jensen's, surprised to find that Jensen was still hard between them.

"You get off on this, don't you?" he gloated, his hand reaching down to grasp Jensen in what must have been an agonising hold on his dick. "You want me to get you off? You think a whore like you deserves to come?"

Jensen didn't speak; he just stared at him with his big green eyes, so open and trusting.

Jared cried out as his release suddenly hit him, taking him by surprise. He couldn't tear his gaze away from Jensen's as he pumped his load into his ass, transfixed on the sad tears that fell from Jensen's eyes.

He choked on a sob, part of him wanting to reach up and wipe those tears away, to make it all better, to apologise for everything. He wanted to bundle Jensen into his arms and keep him safe from everything, most of all the evilness inside his own heart.

"Jen… I…"

Jensen's eyes widened, a glittering of hope daring to make its way through. Jared tensed. What the fuck was he doing? Getting attached to a willing fuck? No chance in hell, he would rather die.

Jared roared as he tore himself away from Jensen, pulling his pants back over his spent dick and glimpsing his release oozing from Jensen's abused hole.

"Get the fuck out of here," Jared snarled, forcing himself not to look at Jensen's broken and bruised body. "And don't you fucking dare come back or I will rip you to shreds, do you understand me?"

He could hear Jensen getting of the bed and dressing himself. He knew the man was still hard but he wouldn't feel bad about it. He'd gotten what he wanted, Jensen be damned.

"Jared," Jensen said softly, pleadingly.

Jared spun to face him, fire in his eyes. He surged forwards, gripping the jacket that was the only piece of clothing that wasn't ruined other than his jeans that hung loosely on his slim hips.

"I don't want to see you here again, now fuck off, you worthless whore."

Jared pushed Jensen until he hit the door, his back slamming into it with such force that Jensen's head snapped back against it with such a sickening thud that Jared had to force himself not to wince and hold Jensen against him, to check that he was alright.

"I love you," Jensen whispered, a desperation in his eyes as the tears fell.

Jared stopped. Everything in him just ceased. Slowly he backed away, turning away from Jensen and back to the barred window that kept him from the outside world. Gradually his body relaxed as he stared at life going on without him. And there he stayed. A silent shadow of the man he used to be.

***

Jensen slipped through the doorway and collapsed to the ground, hard sobs wracking through his painful body. He didn't know how long he sat there, but it didn't matter, it never did and he didn't care. He would do this day after day, for as long as it took.

"Jensen?" a kind voice called, breaking its way into his agony.

"Hey, Dr. Morgan," Jensen replied weakly.

"Jensen, this can't go on. He really is going to kill you one of these days," Dr. Morgan said gently, helping Jensen to his feet.

"I'm not giving up on him, doc, and there is nothing you can say that will make me," Jensen told him, a surprising amount of strength behind his words even as the tears fell unguarded. Jensen looked into kind eyes. "Do you think I'll ever get him back?"

Dr. Morgan lowered his eyes to the ground for moment before lifting them sympathetically to meet Jensen's. "At first I would have said that there was a good chance, but as time goes on I really don't know. The only reason I let you in there in the first place was because he only ever responded to your presence, you're the only thing that gets him away from that window willingly and I don't like restraining him to take him outside. But this is getting beyond dangerous, Jensen. You and Jay are friends and that's the only reason I've let things get this far, but if my superiors knew what was going on…"

"I know, and I appreciate it, I really do. But don't take me away from him, Jeff, please?"

"What if he kills you like he keeps promising? After what he went through, his mind just can't break away from it -"

"He won't hurt me." At Jeff's incredulous look Jensen reiterated. "He won't kill me. He's in there, Jeff; I can see him, more and more every time. He's there and I'm not giving up on him, I owe him that."

Jeff sighed. "Alright, Jensen. Alright. But something's going to have to give pretty soon, cause as much as I want him back I'm not willing to risk you to get it."

"I'll get him, I swear to fucking God, I'm going to find him in there and I'm going to bring him home. He's coming back to me and I don't care if it kills me."

With a last longing look through the small window of Jared's room, Jensen turned and staggered away, pulling his jacket over his naked torso while he carefully flexed his bruised face.

Jeff watched him go before he went to Jared's window and looked at his friend. Jared stared out the barred glass as though there was nothing else in the world. After a few minutes Jared's hand reached up and touched the glass in a move that was so gentle Jeff could hardly believe his eyes and he just knew that Jared was watching Jensen leave the building. Maybe there was hope after all.

End.