December 8, 1999

Raven woke to find himself alone, all but one light on to glow softly where he lay. He sat up and looked around, thinking that Sandman might be nearby, but he could sense that no one was in the huge building. A flash of white caught his eye and he turned his head to see a folded piece of paper on the mattress next to him. He reached out to pick it up and noticed something on his wrist. The wristcuffs had been replaced with a finely wrought silver-studded leather wristband with a delicate silver lock to clasp it closed. A slave bracelet! He saw there was an identical one on his other wrist and he felt a flutter of annoyance, but pushed it aside to read the note:

Raven,
Your progress in our training session is very encouraging. The next level will test both of us. If you can pass this test, you will have graduated. You will be free of your demons...at least the ones that haunt your soul.
You'll have noticed by now the little presents I left you. These bracelets are a symbol and a reminder that you are mine. Only I can release you from your cage. Only I can free you from all you fear. Only I can master you the way you need and hunger to be mastered.
Your next lesson is very soon. Prepare yourself for your transformation.
S

Raven's teeth were grinding angrily by the time he finished reading. He crumpled the letter into a tight ball and hurled it into the gathering darkness, growling a curse before attempting to twist off the bracelets. They were snugly molded to his flesh and the leather was soft but unyielding. He decided to cut them off the first opportunity he had. He dressed in his jeans, slipping his feet into his shoes and glancing at the ripped up shirt that was beyond use. He happened to look at the head of the bed and saw a T-shirt laid out carefully. He went to it and picked it up, flushing slightly when he realized that it was a Sandman shirt. Not the comic Sandman, but his Sandman. He started at the possessive word, surprised and irritated that he would think, even for a split second, that Sandman was his. He despised the bastard and wanted to murder him. He'd humiliated, tortured and made him submit to his will, something that galled him tremendously. But deep down, as he stared at the image of the man standing in a black shirt and jeans, that arrogant grin gracing his lips, he knew that he'd loved every minute of Sandman's domination...which infuriated him even more. He yanked on the shirt, since there was nothing else to wear and stalked out of the warehouse, promising himself that he wouldn't let Sandman get the upper hand again.

******

It had been two weeks since the scene in the deserted warehouse and the two men had avoided each other except during their matches in which Raven would unleash his frustration and rage on Sandman...only to be thwarted in the end by some outside force. The times it could not be helped that they had to spend time in each other's presence, Raven could feel Sandman watching him intently. The few times he'd met his eyes, there was a smug smile flirting around his mouth. Once, he'd directed his gaze to the slave bands and raised a brow as if to inquire if he remembered his status. Raven had been unable to remove the damned bracelets and could feel them burn into his skin every time he looked at them.

******

Two nights later, after a particularly grueling match with Justin Credible, Raven set out from his hotel for a night of drinking and carousing. He needed to unwind and get away from his disturbing thoughts. Perhaps a willing girl would help to banish the little episode in the locker room the night before.

He'd just gotten out of the shower and was drying his hair, temporarily blinded as he walked in the direction of his locker. He slammed into a hard body and stepped back, mumbling an apology, pulling the towel from his face, abruptly cutting his words off at the sight of Sandman standing there, his bright blue eyes amused. He'd tried to step around him, but Sandman blocked his way, catching his wrists and tugging him into one of the empty aisles, pressing him up against the cold metal of the lockers.

"Did you miss me, Raven?" he whispered in his ear, releasing one wrist to stroke his hand down the middle of Raven's chest.

Raven opened his mouth to hiss for him to get the fuck away from him, but Sandman forestalled him with a hard, almost brutal kiss, plundering his mouth boldly, possessively. Raven's mind melted from anger to blazing need...and confusion. What was happening to him? He hated Sandman. He despised every breath, every cell of his being. But he wanted him, too. He craved him with every fiber of his own being and it terrified him. He struggled weakly against Sandman, whimpering softly as he sensuously sucked his tongue. In the end, he surrendered, clinging to his shoulders as he trailed his warm lips across his cheek to his ear.

"It won't be long, sweetheart," he murmured, caressing his bicep. "tomorrow night is your final lesson." And with that, he was gone.

Raven shook his head of the memory, signaling the bartender for a vodka. As he waited for his drink, he turned to survey the room, seeing Sabu, Balls Mahoney and Angel sitting at a table swapping stories, while at another, Simon Diamond, along with his girlfriend, Dawn Marie, Nova and Justin Credible laughed loudly at something that Joel Gertner was saying. His eyes skimmed over the rest of the crowd, halting abruptly as his dark eyes locked with intent blue ones. His heart stuttered and he stiffened with surprise. Damn! He hadn't expected him to be here tonight. He usually frequented the more lively bars on the strip, which is why he'd chosen this one, to avoid accidentally bumping into him.

"Your drink, sir."

Raven dragged his gaze away from the other man and turned to pick up and take a long swallow of the clear liquid, wincing as it hit his empty stomach with a muted explosion. He welcomed the spreading warmth it provided, relaxing him a little.

"Quite a coincidence both of us coming here, hmmm?"

Raven's head snapped to the side to encounter Sandman's gleaming eyes and crooked smile. "Go away, Sandman," he said flatly, turning his attention to the bottom of his glass, trying to ignore the other man.

Sandman chuckled, swiveling sideways on his stool and hooking a foot under Raven's seat, resting an elbow on the bar and leaning forward. "You can't rid yourself of me so easily, Hon," he purred in Raven's ear. "In case you've forgotten, we've got an appointment...tonight."

Raven looked at him, surprise. "Tonight?" He quickly recovered, returning to his surly expression. "There's nothing going to happen tonight."

Sandman stroked a finger down Raven's forearm, laughing when he jerked away and threw him a fulminating glare. "Oh, a lot's going to happen tonight, baby," he corrected. "You just come to my room at midnight and we'll get started on your final session, okay?"

"Don't hold your breath, fuckface, Raven snapped, downing the rest of his drink and rising to his feet, tossing money on the bar and turning to leave.

"You will come to me, Raven," Sandman said softly, compellingly. "We have unfinished business and we're going to take care of it tonight. Remember...midnight."

Raven pretended that he didn't hear and strode away, leaving the bar, feeling Sandman's eyes watching him.

******

He wandered the streets for a few hours, stopping in at various clubs along the way, but finding that he couldn't lose himself in the frenetic music and people, leaving soon after entering. As midnight neared, his thoughts returned to Sandman's words. He didn't want to see him again, especially in a setting that could invite another scene like the one a couple of weeks ago. His mind was still reeling from that encounter. He decided to go to his own hotel room and try and get some sleep. As he rode up in the elevator, he looked down at the wristbands, touching them lightly, his mind going back to when Sandman had, after torturing him viciously, made love to him most tenderly. How he'd loved the way he'd whispered endearments in his ear, the way his hands had roamed his body erotically...the way he'd been possessed completely, and he'd enjoyed it.

When he'd come back to himself, he was shocked to find himself in front of Sandman's door. He blinked, standing there motionless for long minutes, part of him telling him to get the hell out of there, the other part urging him to knock on the door and give himself over to whatever happened. The latter part won. He knocked three times, his heart pounding painfully in his chest. When the door finally opened and Sandman stood before him, a gentle smile on his face and welcoming eyes, he knew that he was doomed.

"Ahh, again, you're prompt. Come in."

Raven tentatively entered the room, wishing he'd heeded his first instinct and left without knocking. What the fuck was he doing anyway? He was voluntarily putting himself in Sandman's power. His eyes fastened on the king-size bed in the center of the room, his throat tightening with apprehension. He immediately went to the window to block the sight of both the bed and Sandman.

"So, you've come to finish this, huh?" Sandman said, going to the bar to get a beer. "Want something to drink?"

Raven started to decline, then changed his mind. "I'll have a scotch."

"Hmm...something new for you, isn't it? You usually stick to beer and vodka. Sometimes tequila."

Raven shrugged negligently. "People change."

"Indeed, they do," Sandman said, making Raven jump at his nearness behind him. He handed him the glass and he took it without a word, taking a long gulp, promptly coughing and spluttering as the liquid burned a fiery path down his throat, hitting his stomach with a boom. Sandman patted his back to help him recover, chuckling. "Easy there. That's a little stronger than vodka, after all."

Raven gave him an irritated glance and sipped the scotch more cautiously. "So, what is it tonight? Whips? Razors? Knives and chains?"

Sandman laughed in amusement, moving away to sit on the foot of the bed, drinking his beer. "Hardly. Though the whips sound intriguing, but maybe some other time."

Raven looked over his shoulder to see if he was kidding, but only saw Sandman's blithe grin. "Just what exactly is it that you want from me?" he asked bluntly, half-sitting on the windowsill, turning the glass in his hands and staring at the light glittering off the dark amber surface.

"Well, Rave, that's a question..." Sandman leaned back on one hand, looking up at the ceiling contemplatively. "I want you to clear your soul."

Raven blinked at him in puzzlement. "Clear my soul?"

Sandman looked at Raven with an intent gaze. "You've got issues that you've buried so long that you don't even know they're there. I'm here to dig them out and expose them."

Raven quirked a dark brow sardonically. "And who appointed you my psychiatrist?"

The other man lifted one shoulder. "I appointed myself. You've got deep-seated problems and it seems that I'm part of them. I want to help you resolve them."

Raven laughed disdainfully. "You want to help me resolve my problems, huh?" he sneered. "Well, if you'd just leave me the hell alone for one, that could eliminate one of them."

Sandman shook his head slowly. "That wouldn't solve anything and you know it. We need to get to the root of it."

"And what if I don't want to 'get to the root of it'? I think I'm doing fine without your psycho-analysis."

Are you?" Sandman questioned quietly, eyeing him dubiously. "No, I think you need to work out why you're really pissed at me. Why you hate me so much."

"I can tell you that right now...I hate you because you're a fucking bastard," Raven snarled, draining the glass and wincing at the burning, setting it down with a thud.

"But why?"

"Why are you a fucking bastard?"

"No," Sandman answered, giving him a disapproving look at his obtuseness. "Why do you think I am?"

Raven opened his mouth to reply and stopped short, unable to think.

"Well?" Sandman prompted sharply. "Have you run so long on the fumes of your hatred that you've forgotten the true reason, the fuel for it?"

Raven's anger grew as he searched his mind for an appropriate response, but nothing came. "Shut up!" he said lamely.

Sandman smiled patronizingly. "You have, haven't you?" He shook his head again, this time in mock-sadness and pity. "Must be an empty life hating someone and not knowing why, eh?"

"Damn it!" Raven shouted, his fingers going to his temples, which throbbed terribly. "I know why. I know why. I just can't...can't think."

"C'mon, Scotty...try," Sandman urged calmly. "It can't be all that hard. Think back."

Raven groaned as a stabbing pain shot through his head. He wished Sandman would quit prodding him. He didn't want to think back. He didn't want to...

******

Scotty Levy crawled out of his window and climbed down the tree, being careful not to make any noise as he slipped through the bushes to the house next door, scrambling up the tree to the wooden treehouse that was built years ago. He climbed through the trapdoor and lay on the floor, panting and chuckling to himself.

"It took you long enough."

Scotty rolled onto his back to see Jim sitting cross-legged close by, leaning his elbows on his jean-clad knees. He sat up, hugging his own knees and smiling at Jim, a dimple peeking from his cheek. "Had to wait till the parents were asleep."

Jim smiled back, reaching for him and they kissed long and feverishly, tumbling onto the floor, rolling around as clothes went flying in every which direction, their 17-year-old hands seeking out the spots on each other's bodies that they knew would please.

After they sated themselves, they lay side-by-side, fingers entwined as they gazed sleepily up at the ceiling. Scotty swallowed hard as he looked at Jim, nervously licking his suddenly dry lips.

"Jim?"

"Mmmm?" he replied, his eyes having drifted closed and well on the way to dozing off.

"I want to tell you something."

"What?" he mumbled, not opening his eyes.

"I-I..." He was having trouble getting the words out. He'd never told another living soul what he was about to say and to say that he was terrified was an understatement. "I...love you."

Jim's eyes fluttered open, focusing intensely on Scotty. "What?"

Scotty cleared his throat. "I don't think I can say it again, Jim," he said with an anxious laugh.

Jim slowly sat up, pulling his hand from Scott's, hunching his shoulders for a long time, not speaking or moving until Scotty thought he'd fallen asleep sitting up.

"Jim?" He waved a hand for him to be silent and Scotty thought he'd made a mistake. That he'd just ruined the best relationship he'd ever had by opening his big mouth.

After what seemed like hours, Jim turned toward him and Scott was shocked to see tears on his cheeks. "Jim...what...I'm sorry!" Scotty popped up onto his knees, wanting to dive into a hole and cover himself with dirt. He wanted to die right then and there. "I never should have said anything."

Jim reached up and gently pressed his fingers to Scott's lips, halting his rush of words. He flashed him a huge, brilliant smile and pulled him into his arms and kissed his face. "No, no! I'm glad you told me because I feel the same. Oh, Scotty...my Scotty..."

Scotty had been so blissfully happy. Not even his father's drunken rages and beatings and subsequent rapes could dim his contentment. Jim was the one he went to after the beatings and the other. Jim was the one who soothed him and made things seem better. He'd never confessed that his father had been molesting him since he was seven years old, fearing that he'd be disgusted and leave him, so buried that deep inside him.

It was after a particularly brutal beating and he'd crawled to Jim for comfort that Jim had suggested telling the police about his father. Scott had refused, petrified of retaliation.

"He'll kill me, Jim," Scotty whined, shaking his head emphatically. "No, I can't report him. They'll just let him go and he'll come after me. I just can't do it."

Jim stared at him for a long time, a look of pity...and something else lurking in those beautiful blue eyes. "So, you're just going to let him continue to knock the shit out of you anytime he feels like it? You're not at least going to fight back?"

Scott ducked his head, fearing that what he'd seen in Jim's eyes was disgust. "I can't, Jim. Don't you understand? If I tried to fight back, it would just be worse."

"Then why don't you run away?"

"What?" Scott said, looking at Jim with wide, surprised eyes.

"Just run away. You're seventeen. I'm planning to go off to college soon. Why don't you come with me?" Jim suggested, a spark of excitement entering his eyes at the prospect of the two of them together. He'd been hating the idea of leaving Scott behind and now here was the solution to that dilemma.

Scott gaped at him, unable to speak for a while. "I can't do that, Jim!"

"Why not?" he asked. "We could get an apartment together and we could go to the same college. You got an offer to go to my college, so-"

Scotty had been shaking his head through this whole speech, his eyes growing sad and he said, "No, Jim. I couldn't leave my mom with him."

Jim's face darkened with anger. "Why the fuck are you thinking about your mom? She hasn't done shit for you. She could care less if you died, much less went off to college."

Scotty looked down at his hands, face flushing. "I know that, but...but he'll start beating on her if I'm not there to distract his attention."

"And so what?" Jim snapped back. "Maybe they'll kill each other and you'll be free of them both for good."

Scotty sighed despondently. "I just can't do that, Jim. I hate them both, but..."

"Oh, fuck it," Jim said tiredly, wiping a hand over his eyes. He suddenly looked much older than seventeen. "Forget it. Let's get dressed and get out of here before your dad figures out that you've snuck out of the house."

But Scotty's father was waiting for him when he climbed in his window, sliding it quietly shut.

"And just where the fuck have you been?"

Scott whirled around to see his burly father standing in the middle of the room, massive arms crossed over his chest. Scotty's mouth went dry and his chest felt so tight that he thought his heart would stop with the pressure. "Dad?"

"Yes, it's me. And you haven't answered my question. Where were you? Off fucking some whore? Or maybe you were drugging it up with those loser friends of yours."

Scott shook his head, knowing his father wouldn't believe him, whatever he said. "No, Dad. I was just-"

"It doesn't matter what you were doing. You snuck out of the house without permission and for that you're asking to be punished."

Scotty cringed against the wall, more terrified of what came after the beating than the beating itself. "Please, Dad...I'm sorry and I won't do it again. I only wanted some fresh air, is all."

His father uncrossed his arms and began unbuckling his belt, pulling it from the loops and doubling it. "Come here, boy."

Scotty begged and pleaded as his father whipped him nearly senseless, then screamed as he proceeded to rape him over and over until he descended into blessed oblivion.

******

When he woke, he found himself in a sterile, white room, IV in his arm dripping clear liquid into his bloodstream. He blinked at the IV for a long time uncomprehendingly. Where was he? His question was answered as a nurse in a light-blue uniform pushed into the room, grinning at his bemused expression.

"Hi! I'm Lily and I bet you're dying for something to drink."

It was then that Scotty realized that his throat was parched and he nodded. She came around the bed and poured him a glassful of water, helping him up to a semi-sitting position. He gulped the water, groaning when the nurse quickly took it away before he was through with it.

"You shouldn't drink too much now, honey. You've been unconscious for a long while."

Scott tried to speak, but found he had to swallow a few more times before he could croak out, "What happened? Where am I? How long have I been unconscious?"

Lily patted his hand sympathetically, proceeding to take his vital signs. "You're at New Jersey Memorial Hospital. You were admitted here by your father-" she broke off, giving him a look full of pity. "and you've been out for about three days."

"Three days!" Scotty exclaimed, then began coughing as his raw throat protested. "What happened to me?"

Lily finished taking notes on the chart and glanced at him. "You can't remember?" she asked carefully.

"Not really," he said slowly, frowning as he tried to nudge his memory. "All I remember is coming home from school, watching some TV, my Dad-" he quickly skirted how his father had objected to him watching TV when he should have been doing his homework and Scotty had made some smart remark and he'd gotten a beating for it. "Then going out to see a friend...coming back and..." Everything came flooding back then. The whipping. The brutal rape. "Where's my Dad?" he questioned, his tone deceptively calm.

"He's sitting right outside. He's been so worried about you. He hasn't left the hospital since you've been admitted."

Scott nodded impassively, lifting his hand to bite at his already ragged nails, staring sightlessly at the ceiling.

"Would you like to see him now?" Lily asked softly, thinking that the handsome boy was still in shock.

"No!" Scotty snapped, then gentled his tone after seeing the startled look on the nurse's face. "I'm sorry. I'm just not up to seeing people right now."

She nodded and smiled. "I understand." She patted his hand again and started toward the door. "I'll just leave you to get some rest, then."

"Lily?" Scotty stopped her as she had her hand on the knob.

"Yes?"

"What-what did my father say happened to me?"

Lily's face became quite sad. "Maybe you should wait until you're more able-"

"Please...I would like to know," Scott pleaded.

She sighed, looking down at the floor as she spoke, her cheeks pinkening at the story. "He-he said that he found you in the backyard, bleeding and incoherent with shock, saying that one of your friends raped you and beat you."

Fury sparked in Scott that his father would say something so vicious and untrue, but he hid his anger and thanked the nurse, glad when the door soughed shut and he was left to stew. He wanted to kill his father for his lies and everything else he'd done to him since he was 7 years old. He vowed to make him pay.

*******

When he was released from the hospital, he packed a duffel bag and, after stealing some money from the jar in the kitchen and waiting for night to fall, he slipped out of the house and went down the street to the liquor store where he used the pay phone to call Jim's house.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Mrs. Fullington," Scotty said, nervously looking over his shoulder. "Is Jim around?"

"Oh, Scotty..." Mrs. Fullington's voice paused before answering carefully. "No, he isn't."

"When will he be back, do you know?"

"Um, well, Scotty, I'm afraid he's gone."

Scott's attention snapped fully to the phone. "Gone? What do you mean?"

"Well, he went to New York to stay with his aunt until the fall semester of college started."

"He what?" Scotty's mind whirled with shock and confusion. "Are you sure? I mean..." He trailed off, trying to compose his thoughts. "Did-did he have any messages for me?"

There was another long pause. "Uh, no. I'm sorry, Scotty. But I'm sure he'll..."

Scotty stopped listening. He hung up the phone without saying goodbye, slumping against the glass door. He was gone. He hadn't even said goodbye. Why? Why had he left him? Had he even come to see him in the hospital when he was out?

He picked up the phone and redialed the Fullington house. "Mrs. Fullington, could I have the number to where Jim is staying? I'd like to talk to him. It's very important."

"Well, Scotty, I'm sorry, but he asked me not to give the number out. He really didn't want to talk to anyone."

"Please, Mrs. Fullington, it's vital I speak with him," Scotty begged, beginning to hate himself for doing so.

"I'm afraid I have to respect Jim's wishes, Scotty." Mrs. Fullington's voice was now becoming cool and distant. "Now, if Jim calls, I'll let him know that you need to speak to him. I have to go. I have company."

Before Scott could try to convince the woman to help him, she hung up. Scotty slammed down the phone in frustration. He knew that Jim didn't want to speak to him. But why? He racked his brain for some reason as to why he'd be upset enough to leave without a word. But he couldn't come up with anything.

Hurt and despondent, he dragged himself back home. No point running away if there was nothing to run to. The one person he'd counted on to support him when he needed it had deserted him and he was alone. He didn't care anymore what happened to him.

******

Raven opened his hazel eyes and looked at Sandman, sitting so nonchalantly on the bed, sipping his beer and watching him closely. All his hurt, all his despair, all his anger returned as if it had happened yesterday. He could see that Sandman noticed the change in his demeanor and had stopped drinking to give him a questioning look.

"So?"

Raven dropped his hands to his sides, his face drained of color, his eyes wide. "You left me," he said so softly that Sandman had to lean forward to catch it.

"I left you?" He looked puzzled but still calm.

"You left me and didn't even say goodbye."

Raven could tell when realization came to Sandman and his face hardened. "I didn't leave you, Scotty."

"You fucking well did!" Raven shouted, launching himself at Sandman, knocking the beer from his hand and driving him backwards onto the bed, punching and biting, wild with pain and anger. Sandman grunted, defending himself as best he could, flipping Raven onto his back and holding down his arms.

"Now calm the fuck down, Rave," Sandman ordered, slapping him sharply.

Raven abruptly sagged, glaring up at him through blazing eyes. "You can't even tell the truth after all this time. You left me. Deserted me like some cheap whore in an alley."

Sandman narrowed his eyes. "You think I deserted you? That's not how I see it, Birdman. But if that's what you think-" he released Raven and lay back on the bed, spreading his hands. "Go ahead. Do what you will. I won't stop you."

Raven rose up, balling his fist, ready to pound Sandman into a pulp, but he dropped his hands to his side, frustrated beyond reason. He couldn't just assault a man that wouldn't fight back, even if he loathed him. "Damn you!"

"Go on, Raven," Sandman whispered. "I know you want to tear into me. Do it. I won't stop you. Here..." He sat up and removed his belt and handed it to him, taking off his shirt and rolling onto his stomach. "Maybe whipping me will suit you better?"

Raven looked at the expanse of smooth skin and felt the rage bubbling up again. He thought of all the years of isolation, of loneliness, of living with his hatred and mental and emotional agony and he landed the first blow, seeing Sandman jerk in pain. But he didn't try to move away, only lay still, waiting for the next blow, which came hard and slashing.

Sandman closed his eyes, biting his lip until it bled as he fought to stay in place as blow after blow struck him with breathtaking force. Finally, he could withstand no more and rolled over, snatched the belt, flung it across the room, and wrestled Raven to the bed. "Okay, that's quite enough," Sandman panted, smacking him as he continued to struggle against him. "Now, let me tell you the truth. The day you left me to go home, I never suspected that your dad caught you sneaking into the house, beating and raping you so badly that you ended up in the hospital. All I knew was that your fucking father came to my house the next day and told me that if he caught me anywhere near you, he'd not only beat the living shit out of me, he'd tell the cops that I did that to you."

Raven quit his struggles and gaped at him. "He didn't!"

"I'm telling the truth, you fucking idiot," he said, giving him a hard shake. "I tried to see you in the hospital and he called the cops on me. I spent the night in jail before my dad bailed me out. I never told them the truth about who put me there, making up some lie about a fight or something. Anyway, your dad threatened me again and I knew that he wouldn't let it go. It was then that I found out that he knew about us."

"He knew?" Raven asked in a mortified whisper. "How long?"

"From what I gather, almost from the beginning."

"Oh, my God." Raven seemed to collapse within himself, all the fire gone out of him.

"I decided that it would probably be best if I just left, thinking that you'd be better off if I wasn't there to provoke your dad into those rages. That's why I went like that." His voice grew soft and sorrowful. "I knew you'd be hurt by me going, but I didn't know what else to do. I didn't want to go to jail and I couldn't get to you, so I did what I thought was best at the time."

A spark of his old fury brightened his eyes. "Well, thanks, Jim. You were doing what was best. You thought things would be better if you left?" He wrenched himself away. "Well, they didn't! They got worse. He raped me every night after that. He broke my nose, my arm, my fingers. He even threw me down the stairs once." He whirled on the man he'd hated...and loved for so long. "I'm lucky to even be alive."

Sandman sat back, shock and horror on his face. "Christ, Scotty...I-I didn't know."

Raven sneered at him, pacing the floor, nearly pulling his hair out with the emotion roiling inside him. "No, of course you didn't. You were off at college, having the time of your life, while I stayed home, enduring all that shit for a few more years, unable to fight back because he threatened me that he'd have me locked up in an institution if I even breathed a word of what was going on. I wanted to kill him. I might have gotten up the nerve to do so if he hadn't suddenly croaked of a heart attack."

Sandman watched the tormented man walk across the carpet, his brain reeling in an agony of guilt, sadness, rage at the dead bastard that brought all this pain down on Scotty. "All I can say is that I'm sorry and that if I had known..."

Raven waved his words away contemptuously. "It's too late for that. What's done is done."

Sandman pulled himself together and stood, grimacing as his back screamed at him, but he ignored it as he went to Raven and hauled him into his arms, refusing to let him pull away. "You're right. What's done is done. Let's move past it, Hmmm?"

Raven stood stiffly in his embrace, wanting so badly to just melt against him and let him comfort, to ease his anguish. But habits were hard to break and he growled, "Let me go. When I said what's done is done, I meant everything. We're done. That was the past and I'm over it."

Sandman leaned back to look at him skeptically. "Uh-huh...that's why you've hated me all these years? That's why you've been brooding over my deserting you for so long? Because you're 'over it'?"

"Why can't you just leave me alone?" Raven wailed suddenly trying to slap his arms away. "What do you care, anyway? You've moved on. You got married, had kids. I bet you haven't even thought of me once until we showed up on the same roster."

Sandman tightened his hold, and forced Raven's face into his shoulder. "You're wrong there, buddy," he murmured. "I've never forgotten you. Never. And I care very much. Always have."

Raven stopped trying to escape and fell against him, digging his fingers into his sides. "Then why didn't you call me?" he said brokenly, his voice full of tears. "Why didn't you write me or try to get in touch with me all this time? I-I...dammit, I loved you! And I thought you felt the same."

Sandman swallowed the lump in his throat, holding Raven as he sobbed into his neck. "I did try once."

Raven raised his head and stared at him in astonishment. "You-you did? When?"

"About a year after I left. I called your house and asked for you."

"I never got any message that you called."

Sandman's voice hardened. "Maybe that's because I got your dad on the phone and he told me...he told me that you'd been killed in a car accident."

Raven stiffened in shock. "He didn't do that...did he?" He said this last uncertainly.

"He did. You can't imagine how devastated I was. It wasn't until 5 years ago that I even knew the truth."

Raven wiped his eyes, which had grown flinty with anger again. "That fucking bastard! If he weren't already dead, I'd kill him now with my bare hands."

Reassured that Raven wasn't going to throw hysterics, he let him go and went back to the bed and sat down with a weary sigh. "He's screwed up a lot of lives, hasn't he?"

Raven went to the bar and poured himself a stiff drink, downing it hastily, coughing a little, but refilled his glass to empty that one too before turning back to the man he'd despised for so long. "Yes. And we haven't done a bad job of picking up where he left off."

Sandman grinned wryly. "Yeah, well, it's all over now. The truth is out...unless you've got something else buried in there."

Raven averted his eyes, setting his glass on the counter. "No. Of course not."

Sandman narrowed his eyes at the blatant lie, but decided to let it go for the moment. "Come here, Scotty," he said quietly.

Raven looked at him in surprise. "What for?"

The blond man smiled and leaned back on the heels of his hands, his lids lowering over his smoldering blue eyes. "We still have unfinished business."

Raven frowned. "What's that? You've got the reason why I hated you all these years and now I don't...really. I still think you're a prick."

Sandman chuckled, stretching out his legs and beckoning to him. "Why don't you come and show me, then, hmmm?"

Reluctantly, he obliged, halting a few feet away, arms crossed over his chest. "What is it you want from me now?"

"Actually, it's what I can give you, Hon," he replied, reaching out and catching Raven's hands, pulling him between his parted legs, trapping them by locking his ankles behind him. Raven had to grasp Sandman's shoulders to keep his balance and he scowled down at him in annoyance.

"And what can you give me, besides a pain in my ass?"

Sandman grinned broadly. "Oh, and here I thought your ass had been taken care of quite nicely."

Raven flushed at the play on his words. "That's not what I meant, and you know it."

"Yeah," he said, laughing. "I know. What I want to give you is control."

"What?"

"I've been dominating you these last couple of sessions. Now, I want to allow you control. But," he amended. "You do understand that I reserve the right to take it back at any time."

Raven didn't know what to think. He was irritated at his assumption that he wanted anything from him, surprised that he'd actually offer something that he knew wasn't easy for him to give up, and a little humbled that he was offering it to him. "Why?"

"Like I told you...I thought that since I'd been-"

"Cut the shit, Jim," Raven interrupted harshly. "Tell me the real reason."

Sandman sighed deeply, letting the air out slowly. "Maybe I'm feeling a little...guilty for what I put you through. If I had known...everything, I would have used other methods to exorcise your demons."

"Would you now?" Raven said coolly. "Well, they're 'exorcised'. You got what you wanted."

Sandman gazed up at him, head tilted slightly, a faint smile on his face. "Oh, no, not everything. I want a lot. I'm a very greedy man. Right now, I want to make up for my treatment at our earlier meetings, though I don't regret a lot of it."

"And just what does this 'giving up of control' mean?" Raven asked neutrally, shivering at the warm, caressing hands on the backs of his denim-clad thighs.

"It means you can do what you want with me...within reason, that is," he added.

Raven's brows rose sardonically. "And what makes you think that I want to do anything to you?"

"Don't you?" he answered, a knowing gleam in his eyes.

Raven blushed slightly, his gaze dropping to his chest. "I don't know. Maybe," he admitted softly.

Sandman chuckled, sliding his fingers up over Raven's ass, moving around to settle lightly on the bulge in his jeans. "C'mon, baby...I'm sure there's something you can think of to do."

Raven looked down at Sandman's fingers slowly rubbing against him, delicately squeezing and palming him until he became throbbingly hard. His nostrils flared as he took a deep breath. "I...believe I've got a few ideas."

"All you have to do is tell me," he rasped, leaning forward to press his lips to his stomach, wetting the fabric of his shirt with his tongue.

Raven skimmed his own fingers up Sandman's neck, cupping the back of his head, holding him there for a long time. "Take off the rest of your clothes," he demanded in a hesitant voice, irked at himself. It wasn't as if he'd never been in command of sexual situations. But for some reason, he felt strange telling Sandman what to do.

Sandman unlocked his ankles and rose to his feet, Raven taking a step back to give him room. He tugged down the zipper of his pants and let them drop to the floor, kicking them aside. He stood still while Raven studied his nude body, waiting for his next order.

"Undress me." Raven trembled a little as Sandman pulled off his shirt, contriving to slide his hands over his chest as he did so. When he'd jerked the shirt over his head and let it fall, Sandman sank to his knees and helped him off with his shoes, working the snug jeans over his hips and thighs to puddle at his feet. Raven stepped out of them and Sandman drew his fingers up the backs of Raven's calves, sitting back on his heels to return the earlier scrutiny, his admiring gaze making Raven's cheeks warm.

"I-want-want to feel your mouth on me," he stammered, frowning at Sandman's little chuckle.

Sandman sat back on the edge of the bed, clasping Raven's hips and pulling him forward. He kissed the center of his broad chest, slowly, lazily working his way to one nipple, biting and licking it until Raven was moaning, his hands twisting restlessly in the blond hair. He moved to the other one, taking his time teasing and nursing it, then trailed lower, darting his tongue in and out of his navel. He then proceeded to drive Raven crazy, flickering the tip of his tongue over and around his shaft, tormenting him by not spending too much time in one place, drawing his balls into his mouth briefly, curling his tongue around the root of his cock and sliding it up the hardness to lightly apply suction to the tip.

"Oh, God, Jim!" Raven gasped, trying to pull his mouth onto him. "Please...suck me. Now!"

Sandman gave a rumbling laugh as he swallowed him down, ravenously sucking him, gently biting the tip when he felt him swelling in readiness to come. He raised his head to look up at his lover, an arrogantly smug grin on his lips.

"Get on the bed...on your back."

Sandman did as he was told, hissing in a sharp breath as he lay down, but he didn't complain as Raven climbed on the bed. He was amused as Raven seemed to be at a loss as to what to do next.

"Don't tell me you've forgotten how to do this, sweetheart?"

Raven sent him a quelling look. "No, I haven't forgotten. It's just..." He couldn't tell him that he felt uncomfortable taking the reins. With Sandman, he'd always been the submissive one. He wasn't sure he knew how to be dom with him. He decided to do what he knew and straddled his legs, leaning forward to kiss him, opening his mouth with his tongue and exploring the interior tentatively, angling his head to the side to deepen it, moaning a little at the sweet heat, flavored with beer. He dragged his mouth away, gasping softly as he trailed his mouth down Sandman's throat, grazing his teeth along the tender cord, moving to one of his nipples, which he'd been fondling. He flicked his tongue over the rigid peak drawing it into his mouth and sucking gently, pleased to hear Sandman groan. He repeated his ministrations with the twin, nipping the bud before working his way down his torso, stroking his hands up the length of Sandman's shaft, feeling it grow between his palms. He kissed the tip, tasting the precome, licking down the throbbing flesh, remembering the instructions from their last interlude, paying close attention to the sensitive vein that ran along the underside of the shaft, sucking and teasing it until Sandman was moaning and arching his hips in pleasure. He swirled his tongue around his balls, nipping and laving them before returning to the thick cock, taking him into his mouth and easing him down his throat, bobbing slowly, his tongue stud scraping over the vein deliciously.

"Oh, Scotty...mmmm...that feels so good."

Raven sucked harder, loving the sound of Sandman's enjoyment, stopping short of actually finishing him, painfully aroused himself. "Turn over," he commanded breathlessly, stretching to the nightstand where a tube of lubricant lay. When he returned his attention to Sandman, he gasped, nearly dropping the tube as he stared in horror at his back. "Holy shit!"

Sandman rose onto his elbows and glanced over his shoulder. "What's wrong?"

"Your back...Christ! I did that?"

Sandman shrugged dismissively. "It's nothing. It'll heal."

Raven stared at the livid welts, feeling a little ashamed that he'd done that. He went back to what he'd been about to do before being interrupted, opening the tube and squeezing the gel onto his fingers, lathering it over Sandman's tight hole. His buttocks clenched as the cold jelly touched him...or perhaps it was the unfamiliar feel of Raven's fingers slowly sliding over his anus, dipping inside briefly before drawing away. Raven then coated his cock, preparing to take him the way he'd taken plenty of his former lovers...

But something was stopping him. He sat there, one hand on Sandman's buttock...and was unable to make himself follow through.

Sandman again looked over his shoulder at Raven. "Now what?"

"I-I can't do it," he muttered, his face flaming as the other man craned his neck around to really look at him.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want control," he confessed almost under his breath, not meeting his eyes.

Sandman rolled over onto his back, growling as it objected loudly, then sat up. "Are you saying you want to relinquish the control back to me?"

Raven nodded, diverting his eyes to his slick fingers. "Yeah, I guess I am."

Sandman grinned, a little relieved. The idea of being invaded did not appeal to him at all, but he'd been willing to endure it to show Raven how serious he was about making things up to him. "OK. Then," he started, fluffing the pillows up and leaning carefully back against the headboard, stretching his legs out in front of him. "Come here and straddle me." Raven obeyed instantly, resting his forearms on Sandman's shoulders. The blond smiled approvingly, tracing his ribs as he ordered, "Kiss me again...hard." Raven did so, moaning as Sandman sensually stroked his straining shaft. "Hand me that tube," he murmured, licking Raven's throat. He warmed the jelly between his fingers before applying it to Raven's anus, stretching him open with first two, than three bold fingers, easing them in and out slowly, watching as Raven's eyes drifted shut in delight, his head falling back as he resumed stroking him.

"You like that, hmmm?" Sandman asked huskily, smiling at Raven's eager nod. "Are you ready for me, baby?"

"Please...yes..."

Sandman removed his fingers, grasping his hips and lifting him, guiding himself to Raven and pushing inside, letting gravity slide him down the hard length. They both groaned at the tight friction, Raven arching his back in ecstasy.

"Ride me, baby," Sandman whispered, sinking his teeth into the meaty part of Raven's shoulder. He groaned again as he began to rise and fall on him languorously. He cupped Raven's ass and tilted his hips up to meet his downward descent, pumping his cock in rhythm to their strokes. Raven leaned forward, capturing his lover's mouth in a hot kiss, delving his tongue into the depths, whimpering as Sandman urged him into a quicker tempo.

"C'mon now...harder...mmmm, yeah, that's it."

"Ahh, Jimmy...mmmm, please..."

"What is it, baby?" Sandman asked, his breathing harsh and rapid.

"Please...I can't...please fuck me, Jimmy."

Before Raven even finished his panting plea, he was on his back and being pounded mercilessly. Raven cried out in feral pleasure, wrapping his legs around Sandman's driving hips, meeting him eagerly.

"Oh, God, Jimmy...faster...yeah, like that. Ooooh!"

Sandman increased the pace, grunting as he plunged, urging Raven to come for him. "You like that, huh?" he husked shallowly. "Lift your hips more...oh, yeah. You gonna scream for me, Scotty? Scream my name?"

Raven rolled his head from side to side, moaning helplessly as the intense sensations scintillated through him. "Jimmy...Jimmy, I love you...love you...don't stop...please!"

Sandman's thrusts almost faltered, but his lust drove him on. He pumped Raven's cock even harder, striving to send him over. "Come on...come on, baby. Shoot for me now."

Raven's moans grew to gasping whimpers. He was just about to rocket into orbit when Sandman stopped, panting into his neck. His eyes flew open and he looked at the man above him. "Shit, Jim, why'd you stop? I was almost there!"

Sandman grinned at the desperate whine in Raven's voice. "I don't think I want to end this just yet. It's too good to rush." Raven cursed him out roundly for his teasing, only making him snort with laughter. He pulled out, smacking his hip and telling him to turn over. After a few more choice words, Raven did so, following Sandman's instructions to get on his hands and knees. "I know you love it this way, Scotty baby...doggy-style, right?"

Please," Raven begged disgruntledly. "will you please stop playing games and fuck me already?" He yelped when Sandman gave him a hard slap to the ass.

"Don't try to rush me, love," he warned, leaning forward to lay his chest against Raven's back, drawing his lobe into his mouth and nipping reproachfully. "You'll get what's coming to you when I'm ready, understood?" He was pleased to feel Raven nod submissively. He took his own shaft in hand and slipped it down the valley of his buttocks, rubbing the tip against the hole, pressing it in, then withdrawing, making Raven wriggle in distress. He pushed in deeper...then pulled out again, chuckling as Raven resumed cursing at him, telling him to hurry up.

"You keep that up and I'll tie you down and make you watch me pleasure myself and come all over you. You want that?"

Raven hesitated, the image of Sandman doing just that sending a jolt of desire through him. But eventually, he shook his head. "No. I want you to come inside me."

"I thought you would," Sandman said, humor rife in his voice. "Then, you'd better behave." He abruptly drove into him, his heavy balls slapping against the back of Raven's thighs with a loud, flat sound. Raven cried out, rearing back eagerly. Sandman paused for a moment, savoring the snug heat, licking the sweat from the nape of Raven's neck, sucking hard and leaving a bruise that would remain for a week. He began to move in long, lazy strokes, groaning softly at the way Raven pushed backwards as he thrust, clamping down on him as he drew out. He angled his hips to stab against his prostate, gratified to hear Raven moan his name. "Stroke your cock, baby" he ordered, to which Raven immediately wrapped his fingers around himself obediantely, matching Sandman's rhythm, which quickened slightly as he felt the tingling in his balls, signaling that he would come soon.

"Oh, Scotty...my baby...I just love being inside you. You're so tight. Just perfect for me. You like me in your hot little ass, sweetheart?"

Raven moaned, his head rolling back and forth between his shoulders, catching his breath as Sandman bit him on the shoulderblade. "Yes, oh yes. You fill me completely...Jimmy...mmmm, so good."

Sandman chuckled jerkily, his respiration becoming harsh and ragged as his pace increased, riding him harder as he encouraged Raven to rock back against him. He grunted with each deep driving plunge, sweat dripping from him to patter on Raven's back, making their bodies slip and slide erotically.

"Awww, yes!" Sandman growled as he could feel his orgasm nearing rapidly. He grasped Raven's hips, slamming into him powerfully, reaching a hand around to grip Raven's, forcing him to match his tempo. "Come on, love...I know you're close. Come with me. I'm about to shoot now. Please...now, come with me now!"

Raven whined in torment, so close...so close... Suddenly, he shrieked as he nearly bolted upright with the intensity of his climax, gasping Sandman's name as he shuddered and fell to the bed, spent.

"Ahh, Scotty...yes! You come so good." He slammed into him almost savagely, then gave a shout as he shot over the edge, coming harder than he'd ever done before, nearly passing out with the force of it. "Jesus H. Fucking Christ!" he panted, collapsing on top of Raven, jerking in reaction. When he was able to regain his strength, he withdrew, slipping down to lay exhaustedly beside him, who turned to snuggle against him. He wrapped his arms around the dark-haired man, kissing his damp temple.

"Damn!" he breathed. "That was intense."

Raven chuckled drowsily. "Very."

Sandman settled down, pulling the blankets up over them. Before Raven drifted off to sleep, he whispered in his ear, "Oh, and I love you, too. Never stopped." Raven's arms tightened around him, purring contentedly. "Now, if we could only fix things between you and Dreamer..."

"Never," was Raven's emphatic response. "That dipshit can fall through his asshole and hang himself for all I care. That ship has sailed and sunk."

Sandman grinned, not believing that the situation between Dreamer and Raven couldn't be resolved. After all, look at he and Raven!



Read story #4 Love in an Elevator in her The Learning Tree series