Song lyrics denoted by ~.

~I'll never
feel the weight
of your hands
inside mine like
diamonds
lace so fine
ballerina
cupcake and
my earthquake
wakes me from a sleep that never comes
are you breathing waiting for me~

Beep. Beep. Beep. I hate that sound, but right now it's the only way I know you're still with me.
The only thing I hate more than the constant beeping is the smell. Antiseptic, alcohol, sick people…death.
I sit here, day after day, hour after hour, holding your hand, talking to you.
Do you hear me?
Are you still with me?
I can't help but wonder, what was going through your mind when you did it? What could you possibly have been thinking when you got into your car and chased after him?
Damn.
I've always hated storms. You used to hold me, tell me nothing was gonna happen, that I was safe with you.
How did we get here? How did we end up like this?
I'm the one that was supposed to do all the crazy shit, take all the risks.

~I didn't really want you
but I want you now
was so foolish of me
feel you tumbling down
into that empty room the lights went out
I want to rescue want to scream out loud
but you will always be mine~

I know how we got here. I gave up. On everything.
We broke up.
Went our separate ways.
You became the superstar and I became…an afterthought.
You got a title, a new protégé.
I got to go home and sleep all day long, waking up when I wanted to and working on my music whenever I wanted.
You got Shannon.
I got…nothing.

~I didn't think I needed you
but I need you now
feels so empty in me
feel you're tumbling down
into that empty room the lights went out
where the music stopped
want to rescue, want to
scream out loud
you will always be mine~

He was mine. You were mine.
I wanted it all…and now I have nothing.
Maybe if me and Shan hadn't gotten into that fight over you.
Maybe if I hadn't told him that you were just using him to replace me.
Maybe if I had known that you really loved him…
You always said that I was selfish, spoiled, self-centered.
I always said that you were a controlling jackass.
But, we always said that we loved each other, no matter what.

I never knew it was eatin' you up inside.
I thought you were upset because you still wanted me.
I didn't understand how you could throw away all those years, all those memories.
I couldn't accept that you were making new memories with him.
When I told him you didn't love him, and he ran out that night, I never thought we would end up here.


When the phone rang, I couldn't believe it.
When the officer told me Shan was in an accident and they were takin' him to the hospital, all I could think about was how you would react, how much you would be hurtin', how I needed to be there for you.
I called your cell phone. At first, it just rang and rang.
I figured you weren't answerin' cuz you knew it was me.
Then a strange voice said hello, and I asked who it was.
The officer said that you probably saw Shan crash his car and tried to stop.
The truck coming the other way never saw you.
They were cutting you out of the car when the phone rang.

~the room spins
they pull you from me
my body burns
tell me of rainbows
the color the rain throws
ballerina
dance softly
she knows when to come only
when she's called~


The doctors say they don't know how you survived.
They say they don't know how you're still holding on.
I've been here with you ever since.
19 days now.
Shannon's gonna be just fine. I tell you that all the time.
I bet you wanna hear it from him, though.

He's being released today.
Shane said he was gonna bring him in to see you.
We weren't sure if he could handle it.
When the door opens and he walks in, I'm almost afraid to look at him.
When I finally do meet his eyes, I have to look away.
I ain't ever seen that look before, not on Shannon's face anyway.
He never said a word to me, just went over and pushed me away from you.

Me and Shane stood, watching the two of ya together.
Shannon leaned down and whispered in your ear.
I swear I saw you smile.
He kissed your forehead, your eyes, your lips.
He held your hand to his cheek.
Then…he told you goodbye.
Said it was okay, he was okay.
He would be strong.
But it was time for you to let go.
And then, the steady beep stopped.
Only to be replaced by a long, loud continuous beep.
Flatline.

~I didn't really want you
but I want you now
was so foolish of me
feel you tumbling down
into that empty room the lights went out
I want to rescue, want to scream out loud
but you will always be mine~

Shane is sniffling, wiping the tears from his eyes as he caresses your cheek, telling you goodbye.
Shannon isn't crying.
He's staring at me, slowly walking toward me.
I don't feel anything when his fist connects with my face.
I don't feel anything when he tells me how much he hates me.
I don't feel anything when he asks if I'm happy now.
I don't feel anything.

I picked out the nicest headstone they had.
But Shannon picked out an even nicer one.
I come to see you every day.
I sit on the other side of the cemetery, watching until he leaves, limping back to his car.
The doctor says his leg may never be completely healed.
I heard he says he don't care.
When he's gone, I come and sit with you, talking to you, asking you to forgive me.
But you don't answer.
You can't answer.
And it's my fault.
I miss you, Matty.
I love you.
I'll see you very soon.

~so so sorry just come back for me now
so so sorry just come back to me now soon~

Read Story #2 Just Can't Dance with Anyone